when i was in year 5, i did a speech on clumsiness for my school’s public speaking contest and to be clever, i tripped on my way to the stage dropping my note cards all over the place, but then i pulled the real ones out of my pocket saying ‘if you’re going to be clumsy, it pays to be prepared!’
everyone lost their shit and i got second place
If you got second place who got first… Did they talk about fire safety and burn the stage down or something
I look like an extremely professional fashionable woman in an Abaya. It probably took me AGES to look this professional right?
WRONG. I’m actually wearing my onesie underneath it and you will NEVER KNOW MWAHAHAHA
Wanna know another secret? Even though i LOOK like I’m paying attention to whatever nonsense you are saying…..
I AM ACTUALLY WEARING HEADPHONES AND LISTENING TO MUSIC
do you ever feel like there’s just so many pretty girls but most dudes are just subpar like there are radiant goddesses everywhere and just piles and piles of guys in backwards baseball caps and sandals
it’s called makeup
you can put eyeliner on a frat boy that doesn’t change the fact that’s he’s wearing a neon muscle shirt and nike flip flops